Wednesday, October 20, 2010

New Rules (with apologies)

At Revolution Moto, we actually have no rules. Buy if we did, these would be the top 10.
Please Note: "New Rules" (with apologies) are the result of REAL events.

  1. Please don't saddle-up on one of our new shop bikes if you're 'going commando' under your pretty sun dress.
  2. Please refrain from walking your dog on top of our counter while we're doing your DMV paperwork.
  3. Please don't shove something in my face and say "smell this."
  4. Please remove all raw meat/eggs/dairy products from under your locked seat before dropping your bike off for 2-weeks. In the summer. While you're on vacation.
  5. Please don't drive your scooter into our show room and up to the counter just to ask us a question.
  6. Please don't go on a "test ride" and come back 2 hours later. With mud all over the bike.
  7. If you've been coming into my shop regularly, since we opened 7 years ago, and you're still asking me what it's like to ride a scooter, it might be time to just buy one and find out for yourself.
  8. If you're paying for a scooter with cash from of a wrinkled brown-paper bag, please remove the 'residue' from the bills prior to the transaction. We thank you in advance.
  9. If you've lugged your own motor oil back from Italy and then bring it in an unmarked bottle for us to use for your oil change, please make sure the bottle doesn't contain Italian anti-freeze instead.
  10. While we like to barter, we're unable to take the following on trade: farm equipment, trucks, cars, jet skis, pool tables, kidnapper vans, power tools, stereo equipment, wedding dresses, "favors," worm farms, or burial plots.


  1. What if my Worm Farm is going commando? Can I set it on a scooter?

  2. Since worms are hermaphroditic, we would be honored to host them on our scooter saddles as they would make an epic trail.

  3. Sweet, I see medical equipment is not listed on the no trade list; I'm bringing mine in. What can I get for a mobile surgical stretcher and an oxygen tank (complete with mask!)? Also, I promise not to wear a pretty sun dress next time...